Do you buy a bridal shower gift and wedding gift from a registry?

Can you answer AG’s question about Weddings?:

I was invited to a shower and in the invitation was their registry information. Does that mean I buy a gift from the registry for the bridal shower AND another gift for the wedding? I thought the bridal shower was for the bride, and the wedding gift is for the new life of the couple, thus the registry.

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Comments

10 Responses to “Do you buy a bridal shower gift and wedding gift from a registry?”

  1. Lexie :) on July 24th, 2009 5:49 pm

    Weddings Feedback: um… i yea i think you buy 2 gifts

  2. LUV2FARM on July 27th, 2009 9:15 am

    Weddings Feedback: What I typically do if I am invited to both the shower and the wedding is get a gift off the registry for the shower & then as the wedding gift give a card with money in it so the couple can use it how they want.

  3. Chicago Lawyer on July 29th, 2009 2:18 pm

    Weddings Feedback: If you attend the Wedding Shower, you give them a gift.

    If you attend the Wedding, you give them another gift– whatever you can afford.

    If you don’t attend one of the above two functions, then all you need to do is RSVP your regrets, and send the couple your well wishes. Though, if feel so moved to do so, you may send a gift even in your absence.

    I usually buy them a shower gift off the registry, and a monetary gift for their wedding.

  4. Barbara B on July 30th, 2009 3:34 am

    Weddings Feedback: Actually, bridal registries should be renamed wedding registries – but that’s another matter.

    Give only one gift. No one should be expected to give and give just because someone gets married.

    One more thing – the notion about “paying for the plate” is bunk. If a wedding couple decides to spend $250 per guest then that is their decision and there is no expectation that other people should reimburse the couple (or parents of the couple) for their choice on how they spend their money.

    If you’re really stumped for a good gift, buy a pretty card, slip a $50 (or an amount that won’t break your budget) inside and take it to the shower with a big smile.

  5. Nora on July 30th, 2009 8:45 am

    Weddings Feedback: you need to give 2 gifts

  6. Jen on August 1st, 2009 2:36 am

    Weddings Feedback: People usually don’t include the same things in a shower registry as in the wedding registry. If you attend both events, you give two gifts.

  7. Cece on August 2nd, 2009 1:46 am

    Weddings Feedback: I’ve been to a few weddings. I always buy something for the bride only and give it to her at the shower and I buy off the registry for the wedding.

    edit- I think it is cute and traditional to give a cute nightie or lingerie for the shower. That is what I meant by something for the bride. At my shower I received things like lingerie, cute bra & pantie sets, a sexy robe, my mother and MIL (both of our parents are single) gave me a combined gift, our honeymoon, I got perfume and things like that. I sent my registry info only for people to get an idea of what we needed. It is up to you what you want to buy, she won’t be offended if you don’t buy off the registry.

  8. kill_yr_television on August 4th, 2009 11:36 pm

    Weddings Feedback: Sadly that primitive database that served as a household’s registry of china, linen, crystal, and silver patterns has become a “gift registry,” a sort of child’s letter to Santa saying “I want this and this and this.” This complaint having been registered (groan), I venture to say that two gifts is indeed what the bride is likely to expect. Choosing from the registry is an option, not a requirement, and should you give otherwise only the most churlish of brides would be so boorish as to complain that her present did not suit her. If one does not attend the shower, it should not be expected that one will send a shower gift but with the level of misinformation it is guessing game to know what any bride expects.

  9. *Miss_Autumn* on August 7th, 2009 11:47 am

    Weddings Feedback: If you buy a shower gift, you are not required to buy a gift for the wedding too. Especially since most people can’t afford to do so. The shower gift is for the couple. The registry is for the couple, not just the bride, which is why the information for the registry is given with the shower invitations.

  10. Cammie on August 9th, 2009 12:34 am

    Weddings Feedback: Having registry info on an invitation is tacky.
    That said, I bought a friend one bath and one hand towel that was on her registry for the shower.
    I did the same for the wedding.

    That might work for you.
    If she wants more than one of something.

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